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A boy who unknowingly breaks a 200-year-old truce between two warring factions of vampires. Pulled into a fantastic life of misunderstood sideshow freaks and grotesque creatures of the night, one teen will vanish from the safety of a boring existence and fulfill his destiny in a place drawn from nightmares.
Fantasy Adventure - This is an effects-heavy fantasy adventure based on the young adult
book series. Aimed a tweens and young teens, the film is too
intense and possibly frightening for young children. Fans of a
number of the adult actors may be disappointed that most of them
have small roles.
Berardinelli, Internet CriticFull Review Average ...the most glaring of which is its inability to build to a conclusion. It stops in the middle, expecting viewers to wait for the next installment, which will probably never arrive. That makes it not only a waste of time, but a tease.
USA TodayFull Review Above Average ...perhaps best of all, the movie doesn't take itself too seriously. It's creepy but tinged with sarcasm and infused with silly fun.
Note: The rating
above is our interpretation of what the critic would give this movie based on
their review. We are not affiliated with these critic's in any way.
OPINION OVERVIEW The following is the original "What's Worth
Watching" write-up for this movie.
Based on a theater exit polling of 75 moviegoers:
TEENS:Both males and females LOVED "THE VAMPIRES ASSISTANT." The male reviews are very high but the females reviews are EXTREMELY HIGH.
TWENTYSOMETHINGS:Most of the males enjoyed "The Vampires Assistant" very much. Only one rated it below average. These female reviews aren't nearly as high as the teen female reviews and the adult female reviews. For this reason I would say there are too few reviews to be accurate. I believe most females will enjoy this movie very much.
ADULTS:The males reviews are very good, but not quite great. A third loved it but more than a third rated it "Very Good," which equals above average. This is a high review as long as it doesn't make up too large a percentage of the total reviews. Also, a fair number of reviews are average to below average. The female reviews are a fair amount higher than the male reviews so I personally recommend "The Vampires Assistant," if this is your type of movie.
Darren Shan (CHRIS MASSOGLIA)
was like most kids in his suburban neighborhood. He
hung out with his best friend, Steve (JOSH HUTCHERSON), got decent
grades and usually stayed out of trouble. But when he and
his buddy stumble upon a traveling freak show, things
begin to change inside Darren. That's the exact moment
when a vampire named Larten Crepsley (JOHN C. REILLY)
offers to turn him into something, well, bloodthirsty.
Newly undead, he joins the Cirque Du Freak, a
touring sideshow filled with monstrous creatures
from a Snake Boy (PATRICK FUGIT) and
a Wolfman to the bearded Madame Truska (SALMA HAYEK) and a gigantic barker named Mr. Tall
(KEN WATANABE). As Darren flexes his newfound powers in
this dark world, he becomes a treasured pawn between
the vampires and their deadlier counterparts, the
vampaneze. And while trying to survive, one boy will
struggle to keep their brewing war from devouring
what's left of his humanity.